Things That Should Come With Specific Instructions
Posted by capricorn1966 on April 26, 2008
1. Straws: Never blow bubbles through your straw while intoxicated. It will make you snort laughter through your nose and regurgitate causing your airways to close up, hence you stop breathing.
2. Stoves: Never use a match to light your stove if the gas has been on for more then five seconds.
3. Skateboards: Warning, NO BRAKES.
4. Stool softeners: Do Not take with any other fiber supplement.
5. House Plants: Must water frequently.
6. Beach chairs: Must be in locked position.
7. Microwaves: Will melt plastic.
8. Vacuum Cleaners: Will not work on concrete.

The Bagel of Everything said
Printers: Not intended for penile tattooing.
capricorn1966 said
Bagel, don’t ruin my day.
capricorn1966 said
I like to think that pressing a man’s dick between two pieces of glass would come in handy someday.