Life As I See It

Look Mom, There Are Lesbians Sitting Behind Us


Michele, not only is my best friend and champion, we are related, first cousins, as Nikki is my sister.  We are closer then ever and sometimes show it in a transparent way.  Everybody needs to explore their sexuality at one time or another.  We don’t perform any lesbian acts nor do we have the desire to with anyone else. 

We entertain ourselves in a much different manner then most.  Our sense of  humor goes beyond the ordinary.  We laugh, at what most people would think was small minded. We don’t sit around telling jokes, we don’t go to movies to laugh, we don’t go out to dinner to laugh. 


When we took Danielle to visit colleges, we pretended we were her lesbian parents.  This didn’t bother Danielle in the least, knowing that our sense of humor wasn’t on the same sanity level as most, she just ignored us.  We occupied ourselves for the four hours we were there and nobody would be the wiser.

 We were out to dinner with our family, my sisters and mom and Michele and her mom.  We do this every year at Christmas.  Two years ago we decided to try this smorgasbord in the Lancaster area.  So, as we were walking up to get our food, there was a table where a bunch of old people were sitting, Michele and I both looked at each other, knowing what each of us was thinking, without opening our mouths, we held hands and walked up to get our food.   The heads turned and the whispering started.  The looks we got walking back was all worth the trip. 


Last night Michele and I went to a concert with four other people to see Def Leppard and Styx.  Let me just give you a little bit of insight on rock concerts.  Rock concerts are places where you  go to that’s not within the existing world.  What I mean by that is, it doesn’t matter how you act or what you say, there is nobody there to judge you for being to loud or saying the wrong thing or using bad words or just dancing in the street.  Everybody is in the same realm as you.

This is how it starts, five hours before the concert everyone meets at a house.  Have some food and drink.  Drink some more. After drinking for a few hours, you fill up a cooler with the rest of  the alcohol you have and head on down to the concert.  You find a parking spot, take the cooler out and blast the music of the band you going to go see. 

FYI…If you are at a Jimmy Buffet concert you DO NOT play Nickle Back, I almost got beat up.  

You sit, make friends, drink their alcohol, maybe smoke some weed, because I think the rules don’t apply when your at a concert.  Once you are wasted you try to find you way in.  


Michele and I not being in our right state of minds, decides we are going to have a little bit of fun.  As were walking in finding where we are going to sit, hand in hand, we decided to sit down behind two couples, mom and dad, daughter and boyfriend.  Being ever so loud, not caring who is listening or watching, we sit on the grass and continue our masquerade.   The girl in front of us turns to her mother and says “Look mom, there are lesbians behind us” 


What a fucking awesome time……..


2 responses

  1. I love that I am best friends with my sister, and throughout my childhood, I was best friends with my cousin, Katie. In between Katie and Spanky, I met Selene. We called ourselves “Sisters in an Attic” which is a story too long to post in a comment.

    Unfortunately, all of “best friends” live far away from me. For a brief year, Selene and I lived in Philly together. Zoey and Claire were toddlers. I was a journalist. And Selene and I raised hell just like you write about you and Michele. We were nutzo alien hunters. She’d show up at the paper, sit at someone’s desk, prop her feet up and remain in the position until I convinced my editor that I needed to take some on-location photos. I hate thinking of those memories. It reminds me of how boring my life has become.

    Also, Selene doesn’t have kids. So our conversations are never, “and how can I get them to sleep through the night?” or “oh, this potty training…blah, blah, blah” She always reminded me of who I was when were kids and that having kids didn’t change that at all.

    July 21, 2007 at 8:59 am

  2. Hello All,

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    October 1, 2007 at 3:07 am

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