Life As I See It

Cranky Bitch, PMS

I’ve been getting up at 6:00 in the morning since Tuesday, which I’m not use to yet so I’ve been a little cranky.  “ya know this trash is starting to smell, I think it needs to be tied up and taken out.”

The one thing I hate is to be ignored, that’s why I’m so good at reciprocating the pleasure.  I go upstairs to get ready for work and when I return the trash is still sitting in the same spot.  “I really think this trash needs to be taken out.”  Now, you would think that being married to a Goddess, the divine mother of the universe, that my husband, who is home from work today would jump up and do as I ask.  Noooooo….Why?  Because he’s a man.  And men always wait to be asked three times before doing the deed.  Just like children do.

Danielle is having a babysitter come for Lexi today so I said, “ya know, the babysitter is coming today, why don’t you pay her some extra money so she can clean my house?”

“I don’t think so,” he says.  “Why would, I do that?”

“Because my kitchen floor needs to be mopped.  My rugs need to be vacuumed.  My stairs need to be wiped down.  And as much as I love the Herman Munster look, the hanging lights need desperately to be cleaned.”

“So clean them.”

“I’m just warning you right now, my PMS started two days ago and it’s really bad.”

“No, it started a year and a half ago.”


6 responses

  1. I feel your pain. All I wanted to do yesterday was read, but no. I instead had to bitch at everyone around the house to clean up their shit. This translated into me yelling at them and then picking up their shit.

    Oh, and what the fuck is up with kids building tents all over the house????? My kids started putting blanketed tent structures up on Friday and by last night, I was blowing my top!

    September 8, 2008 at 9:06 am

  2. Want some midol?

    Oh, and the tents? They’re for security reasons. When the pimp mac daddy starts yelling, it gives them a safe place to be. I use to hide under the bed, we were too poor for blankets.


    September 8, 2008 at 3:30 pm

  3. joe

    i used to have a maid. she used to double as my girlfriend. didnt know that when dumping the girlfriend, the maid would also go.

    and that, in short, is the worst break up ive ever had.

    September 10, 2008 at 11:07 am

  4. Well Joe, it could be a lot worse, you could of dumped you girlfriend and still had a maid, then you would of had to pay an old girlfriend.

    September 10, 2008 at 5:18 pm

  5. Joe, that’s almost the best story I’ve heard today, except that Matt told a really good one at that I read earlier and it involves his pee pee, not a maid.

    Still, you get credit for banging the maid.

    September 11, 2008 at 4:36 pm

  6. Yo. I’m sick of looking at this post. Pick up the pace in here.

    September 13, 2008 at 12:43 pm

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